Why You’re Still Not Successful (Even Though You Know Exactly What To Do)

• If your goal is to make more money, what will you do with that money?
• Will you pay off your student loans, upgrade your living situation, or take your kids on a trip? 
• Do you want to make enough money so your spouse doesn’t have to work anymore? 
• Maybe your goal is to complete your degree so your mom can finally watch you walk across that stage.

Whatever reason you may have for wanting your goal, be sure to write those down. 

Emotion is the secret sauce that will kick your success into high gear.

You don’t take responsibility for your actions

This is a big one. People who never take responsibility for their actions will never be successful.   

I repeat.

If you don’t take responsibility for the results you’ve gotten out of life due to YOUR actions, you will NEVER be successful. We all know someone who enters failed relationship after failed relationship, and always has some type of drama going on in their lives.   

After each failed relationship, they tell you some story of woe and despair about how the other person “did them wrong”, or how the other person was an asshole. 

I’ve had both men and women come to me for coaching, telling me how they keep ending up with liars, cheaters, assholes, etc. Unfortunately, I have to tell these people the bitter truth. 

They’re the ones who chose to date these people.

• If you’re working in a job paying shitty wages, YOU’RE the one who agreed to work there.
• If you’re complaining about being in debt up to your eyeballs, you’re the one who chose to spend money you didn’t have.

People who think this way choose to think that life just HAPPENS to them, and they never realize that they are responsible for what happens in their life.

• Once you take accountability for your actions, this is a game changer.
• Once you realize that YOU’RE responsible for the results in your life, you should also realize that you’re the only one who can change things. 

All of this may sound harsh, but look at it this way.  Now that you know you’re responsible for the results of your life, it should also come as a relief that you can also change things for the better. 

Instead of thinking that you have to wait for your boss to give you a raise, you should now feel empowered to go out and get a higher-paying job instead of sitting around waiting on someone else to do something. 

When you take responsibility and realize that you’ve been choosing to date losers, you understand that it’s entirely up to you to raise your standards when it comes to dating.

Stop blaming others for your lack of success and starting figuring out what you need to do in order to shake things up.

You refuse to invest in yourself

People are always fearful when it comes to “investing” their money. If they’re thinking about investing their money in stocks, a business, or some other venture, they’re always fearful of losing their money. 

Even with that being said, these same people who throw their money into something where they have no control will refuse to invest any money in themselves. 

Investing in yourself is one of the few things you actually have control over! When you invest money in yourself, you have complete control over the return on that investment.

The only time people seem to be gung-ho about investing in themselves is when they borrow ridiculous amounts of money to go to college. These same people will invest tens of thousands of dollars on an undergrad degree, but they won’t pay a couple hundred dollars to work with a career coach. 

People will spend almost $100,000 on an MBA in the HOPES of landing a better job, but won’t pay $200 for a professional to write their resume. People have been investing in bitcoin like crazy, but a lot of these same people scoff at the idea of paying $50 for a book to learn about investing in real estate.

Investing in yourself is the absolute BEST investment you will ever make because it has the highest rate of return. One of the absolute best investments I ever made was a 3 day seminar on NLP.

As a natural introvert, learning how to communicate with people better has paid many dividends, and it’s been incredible for my coaching business.

• You can invest in yourself in lots of different ways. If you want to become better at speaking, you can pay for a speaking course or attend Toastmasters.    
• You can start reading more books, attending workshops and conferences,  or hire a coach. By investing in yourself, you’re sending a powerful message to yourself  that you truly believe in your ability to succeed.

The Execution Gap Is Why You’re Stuck

You don’t have a knowledge problem.

You have an execution problem.

You already know you should:

• Set clear goals
• Take responsibility
• Invest in yourself

And yet… nothing changes.

That gap between knowing and doing is where most people stay stuck.

Example:

You know you should raise your prices.
You’ve known for a year.
You’ve even talked about it.

But your prices are still the same.

That’s the execution gap.

A business coach won’t just ask what your goals are.
They’ll look at what you actually did last week. And what you avoided.

Because success is built on behavior, not intentions.

Your Goals Are Useless Without a System

Writing down your goals is a start.

But goals alone don’t produce results.

You need a system that forces action.

Here’s what that actually looks like:

• Outcome goal: “Make $100K this year”
• Process goal: “Close 3 clients per month”
• Activity target: “Book 10 sales calls per week”

Now you have something measurable.

Now you can track it.

Now you can adjust it.

Without this, you end up with goals that sound good but don’t change your behavior.

Real example:

Someone says they want to make more money.
But they aren’t tracking:

• Outreach
• Conversations
• Conversions

So nothing improves.

A performance coach will ignore your big goal and go straight to your weekly numbers.

Because that’s where success is actually built.

Motivation Is Not What You Think It Is

You’ve probably told yourself you just need more motivation.

That’s not true.

Motivation is unreliable.

It shows up when things feel good.
It disappears when things get uncomfortable.

That’s why people start strong and then fade.

What actually works is structure.

Example:

Person A waits to “feel ready” to reach out to clients.
They do it twice a week.

Person B schedules 5 outreach blocks in their calendar every week.
They do it no matter what.

Guess who wins.

The difference is not motivation.
It’s commitment built into the schedule.

Simple tools that work:

• Pre-booked time blocks
• Non-negotiable weekly targets
• Public commitments

A coach won’t hype you up.
They’ll help you build a structure you can’t easily escape.

Responsibility Means Tracking Your Patterns

Taking responsibility isn’t just saying “it’s my fault.”

It’s identifying the patterns you keep repeating.

Because the same behavior will always produce the same result.

Look at this:

• You keep dating the same type of person
• You keep undercharging your services
• You keep staying in jobs that don’t grow you

That’s not bad luck.

That’s a pattern.

And patterns are predictable.

Example:

A coach comes in saying, “All my clients are difficult.”

But when you look closer:

• They don’t set boundaries
• They overdeliver
• They avoid hard conversations

The result is baked in.

Once you see the pattern, you can change it.

A relationship or mindset coach will point out what you can’t see.
Not just what happened. But what you keep doing.

Deadlines Work Because Time Expands

Ever heard of Parkinson’s Law?

Work expands to fill the time you give it.

That’s why a task with a 2-week deadline takes 2 weeks.
And the same task can get done in 2 days if it has to.

Without a deadline, things drift.

You think about them.
You plan them.
You don’t finish them.

With a deadline, you prioritize.

Example:

No deadline → “I’ll update my website soon.”
With a deadline → “Website goes live Friday at 5pm.”

Very different behavior.

If you struggle to follow through:

• Set shorter deadlines than feel comfortable
• Tell someone else your deadline
• Attach a consequence if you miss it

A productivity coach will tighten your timelines on purpose.

Because urgency creates action.

Investing in Yourself Only Works If It Pays You Back

A lot of people “invest in themselves.”

Courses. Books. Programs.

But nothing changes.

Because they consume information instead of applying it.

Real investment has a return.

Example:

• $300 resume rewrite → $8K salary increase
• $1,000 coaching program → 2 new clients per month
• $50 book → one idea that changes how you sell

That’s ROI.

Now compare that to:

• Buying courses you never finish
• Watching videos you don’t implement
• Taking notes you never use

That’s not investment.
That’s avoidance disguised as progress.

The best investments:

• Change how you behave
• Increase how you earn
• Compound over time

A career or business coach will push you to apply, not just learn.

Because applied knowledge is the only thing that pays.

Your Environment Is Quietly Controlling You

You think success is about discipline.

It’s not.

It’s about environment.

Your environment either makes things easier… or harder than they need to be.

Example:

You want more clients.

But:

• Your booking link is buried
• Your offers aren’t clear
• People have to message you back and forth

That friction kills action.

Now compare that to:

• One-click booking
• Clear offers
• Simple next steps

Completely different result.

Same effort. Different setup.

Another example:

You want to save money.
But your paycheck goes into one account and gets spent automatically.

Versus:

Money gets moved to savings the moment you’re paid.

No decision required.

The best setups remove friction and make the right action the default.

This is why structured systems work so well.

When clients can see their progress, track goals, and stay engaged between sessions, they stick around longer and get better results .

Because the environment is doing part of the work.

A good coach doesn’t just change your mindset.
They help you redesign your setup so success becomes easier to follow through on.

If you’re struggling with feeling stuck and you know you aren’t living up to your true potential, let’s work together and figure out what’s holding you back from success!

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