Happiness as a Goal: Coach Tracy Hamilton

In the spirit of our Happiness Goals Countdown 2015—our quest to raise the world’s happiness quotient through goal-setting—we invited some of our coaches to share their views about goals. In our first interview, coach Tracy Hamilton describes how happiness and goal-setting are intertwined for her clients.

What priority is happiness as a goal for your clients?

Happiness is probably the main priority or desired outcome for most of my clients; although it comes in different guises. They may identify something that they think will make them happy and try to achieve that. Anything that can make them feel better.

I find that the goal may be something along the lines of — I want to have better relationships  or break out of this anxiety trap I am in. So the goal is then set up to achieve that, and the outcome results in more happiness.

When someone comes to me saying “I want to be happier,” it’s such an intangible thing. How can it be assessed and measured when we don’t know what happiness means in their world? I have to quantify what that means to them, what would make them feel happier and how they will achieve it.

Where do you find real contentment comes from for your clients?

I think contentment comes from many areas — feeling supported, achieving something that was once thought to be impossible, a sense of belonging, self-esteem and connection with others.

SEE ALSO: If you want to get more from your life, and are looking for concrete action steps to get you there, check out our Request a Coach page. It’s a “cut the fence-sitting and take action” way to tackle your issues and actually find success. You’ll be matched with the coaches most suited to you to get you from where you are to where you want to be. To get off the fence and start to take action, click or tap here.

What kinds of goals lead to the greatest happiness?

A lot of people come to me as a last resort. They’ve tried to figure it out themselves and got stuck in a circle of repetitive thoughts and can’t see a way out. When they gain clarity, and can see a way forward, or gain a new perspective then the pressure is much reduced. When people can see that they can take the initiative and create the solution themselves through action, positive attitude and there is an outcome to be seen, there is chance of greater happiness.

In such instances I have found that most people feel  happier, gain clarity, and can eventually see the gift in their situation. Peace of mind adds to happiness and seeing away forward can greatly increase both.

Goals that seem easy to achieve, can be taken quickly and that inspire the client to take the next steps seem to lead to the greatest happiness. Once the client can feel a change in their mood and feel happier in themselves they are more able to take the next steps to creating greater happiness in their lives.

” I would say that goals that really push and challenge a person lead to long term happiness“

What kinds of goals lead to longer term happiness than other types of goals?

Interestingly I would say that goals that really push and challenge a person lead to long term happiness. Once you start achieving goals you gain a confidence in your ability to succeed, then setting more challenging goals can increase that confidence, sense of worth, self esteem and therefore happiness levels.

What kinds of goals do clients feel will bring them happiness, but often fail to?

I find that the quick fix goals do not lead to real happiness. Goals that are set to put a sticking plaster on the situation. When someone is fully committed to proper change, i.e. looking at their life as a bigger picture, addressing the underlying issues rather than the symptom and making considered goals that change things on a deeper level rather than ‘fire fighting’, then there is a deeper sense of achievement and therefore, happiness.

How do you support a client in creating beneficial goals?

I get them to be really clear on what they want to achieve and identify the most obvious and manageable steps to take. I ask them to visualise the outcome and if it doesn’t feel right to re-adjust their vision until it feels right; then it becomes manageable and achievable.

I like to support clients by encouraging them to push themselves to create a challenge—nothing too daunting to begin with, then I’m there to encourage and support them through the journey

SEE ALSO: If you want to get more from your life, and are looking for concrete action steps to get you there, check out our Request a Coach page. It’s a “cut the fence-sitting and take action” way to tackle your issues and actually find success. You’ll be matched with the coaches most suited to you to get you from where you are to where you want to be. To get off the fence and start to take action, click or tap here.

Does achieving goals lead to greater happiness for your clients?

I would say that happiness is a by-product of achieving goals. The problem is resolved and happiness, a sense of purpose, clarity and self-worth are the rewards. I think they are all intertwined, and when the client feels good about themselves and their lot, their happiness is increased.

How do you help your clients make progress towards their goals?

I keep reminding them where they are now and how they are feeling. I get them to go into how their life is and how it would be if they did nothing about it. They identify with the cost of not taking the necessary steps to achieving their goal. I find that they then discover a hidden motivation that was not available to them previously.

What blocks goal achievement?

Apathy, not being committed to the goal, lack of motivation, comfort zone, self doubt, who am I to want better things, self worth issues, confidence, lack of support, finances, fear of failure, timing, unrealistic goals, a sense of powerlessness,

What helps goal achievement?

Clarity, motivation, a commitment to do whatever it takes to achieve the goal, the ability to keep going and change tactics if what they are doing is not working, not being afraid to fail, self assurance, confidence, self-worth, tenacity, determination, accountability, support system in place

” Happiness is a by-product of achieving goals. The problem is resolved and happiness, a sense of purpose, clarity and self-worth are the rewards“

What do you think your clients need in order for you to support them in setting happiness goals for 2015?

Overall, I can support people best when they have an idea of what they want to achieve. There doesn’t have to be a clear direction but a willingness to look at themselves and do whatever it takes to get there. When they are honest with themselves if asked to self-reflect, and able to look at themselves in ways they may not want to without being defensive and aggressive; these are qualities that I can support best.

Whatever the client wants will also depend on how I can best support them. If they come for a One Month Package of sessions the clients needs to know what they want to achieve and we can work directly on that. These sessions are great where a break through is necessary or a new perspective on an area that is holding them back or that keeps repeating itself is present in their life.

Three month sessions – these clients generally have a lot going on and there is too much for them to see the wood for trees. Everything on every level seems to be out of kilter. For me to support these clients it is important that they are willing to look deeper at themselves, then we can identify underlying issues, and let them unravel throughout the sessions.

A lot of my clients have come to me in chaos, with an erratic or rash plan in their heads, though once we have talked through their situation they discover that other solutions begin to appear. There is a tendency for those who want the ‘quick fix’ to go with the first thought and then feel that they’ve ‘got it from here’ and that the action they take will resolve all their problems. However, from experience the initial thought is usually a first and crucial step that many more steps arise from. A willingness to take the whole journey works best for me to support such clients.

When people respect their time and my time, and come to sessions prepared and knowing what they want to focus on then a lot more can be achieved. This helps the sessions to be focused and for them to find the best solution for them as soon as possible. So an understanding of coaching, what it is and how to get the best out of it can really help productivity throughout the sessions.

I like the idea of helping to increase happiness and I have found that when people are happy with who and what they are and do not try to compromise themselves, then challenges are dealt with more effectively. The higher the confidence and self-esteem levels are the higher the happiness levels tend to be.

I find that having a gratitude practice has been really valuable for happiness and it brings about a positive outlook since it focuses on what we do have and what good there is in our life already.  People who are negative and pessimistic tend to find all the things that are missing in their life instead of being glad for what they do have. When we are grateful we find more things to be grateful for, and become happier in the process.

SEE ALSO: If you want to get more from your life, and are looking for concrete action steps to get you there, check out our Request a Coach page. It’s a “cut the fence-sitting and take action” way to tackle your issues and actually find success. You’ll be matched with the coaches most suited to you to get you from where you are to where you want to be. To get off the fence and start to take action, click or tap here.

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Contact Tracy to learn more about how she can help you reach your goals. For more about goal-setting and happiness, check out the Happiness Goals Countdown, where we help you set goals this year that will help you increase your happiness!

If you want to get more from your life, and are looking for concrete action steps to get you there, check out our Request a Coach page. It’s a “cut the fence-sitting and take action” way to tackle your issues and actually find success. You’ll be matched with the coaches most suited to you to get you from where you are to where you want to be. To get off the fence and start to take action, click or tap here.